Week 1: Lanzarote Training

Montreal’s Plateau Mont Royal at night

After what seemed like an interminable 3-week off season, I’m officially back to training, which makes for a happy Kay 🙂  Having exchanged a few emails with my coach, Jordan Cheyne, fine-tuning this coming season’s long-term plan, I’m feeling pretty excited and confident that it will be another fun and challenging year. Before I started working with Jordan (Peak Form Coaching), I would never have guessed an “online” coach would be ideal for me. I was sure I needed group workouts and in-person sessions with a coach. It turns out not only is that not the case, but I actually work better with the current set up. Why? It’s not so much online vs in-person coaching situations but the particulars of how the current set-up fits what I need from a coach:

• Flexible workout scheduling: Jordan’s weekly training schedule arrives in my in-box like clockwork. I have a work schedule that is very demanding at times — where I’m at my desk all day, evening, and into the wee hours of the morning — and other times flexible enough that I can take an hour or two mid-afternoon to do a workout. Unlike a lot of my training friends, I don’t have a 9am to 5pm schedule; I work on weekends and evenings. My work comes first; training comes second, but I’ve gotten very efficient at setting out my daily workflow and looking for ideal times to add my workouts in. That means, however, that set group workout times can be difficult for me to work my schedule around. So receiving a training plan that lets me choose when during the day the workout will take place means I have a higher rate of workout completion.
• Online training files: I’ve mentioned this before in another post, but knowing your coach is looking at your training data and uploaded workouts on Strava is something I find highly motivating and it keeps me accountable. Last year, I estimate I completed over 90% of the workouts. This year, my goal is to bring that closer to 100%. Jordan makes that easy by creating some flexibility in the workouts: for example, if I’m feeling tired, there’s an option to do a slightly shorter version of the run workout; if I’m feeling good, then I have the option of doing 10 or 20 minutes longer. Having a buffer zone built into the “successful” workout means I can make my own decisions without feeling like I’ve failed in the workout. That’s important.
• Strong communication: the online coaching can only work if you and your coach have a good system for regular communication. Jordan’s communication skills are top notch and his response time is under 24hrs. But I know that as a pro cyclist he’s also balancing other commitments, so in turn, I aim to keep my emails relatively short, providing him with the info and updates he needs for the next week’s training plan and asking questions that don’t (normally!) require an essay in response. That said, he always gives each of my questions their due — a paragraph in response.
• Facilities flexibility: working with a coach online means that I have the freedom I need to choose facilities or join other group swims and workouts as I like. Because I don’t have a car, being committed to a coach who works out of particular facilities can be difficult for me, as it add a lot of bike-commuting time to get to pool or track facilities across town and sometimes makes it impossible for me to get to my next meeting or appointment on time — something my carless training buddy Alison understands well. More frustrating is that often those group workouts assume you have a car: for a bike-run brick workout, for example, it’s often assumed you’ll just lock up your bike in or on top of your car. When I can go to my closest pool and use my house as a transition zone for brick workouts, getting the workouts done is infinitely easier for me. As a result, I complete a much larger % of the training plan.

What all of this means is that the coaching dynamic allows Jordan to work remotely and for me to temporarily relocate, as I have, to Montreal, and for everything to carry on tickity boo.

With Ironman Lanzarote now only 24 weeks away, we have our work cut out for us and I’ve made a list of 4  race-performance-oriented goals which I’ve shared with my coach. I’m keeping those under my hat, however, (sorry!) and will share what I think are the more important goals, none of which are race-performance-related:

1)  Learn to love swimming! Swimming has never been a great love of mine and it’s starting to really take its toll, holding me back in races as my bike and run get stronger. I’m typically last out of the water in my age group and then have to make up time on the bike and run. To meet my swim-love goal I’ve found a pool that I like, a tri club that has good swim sessions, and a swim coach who’s offering a January swim camp. I’m 100% committed to embrace swimming: this year is gonna be all about the swim.

2) Complete as close to 100% of the training plan as possible and do high-quality workouts. I mentioned above that I’ve already made some pretty big strides on this front, thanks to Jordan’s coaching methodology. This season, I’m aiming higher: from the beginning, I’m trying to stay 100% committed to completing each workout and to doing them well. For example, I realized I have a tendency to do a lazy warm up on the bike: on the trainer, I’m not super focused during the warm up and am just spinning my legs. And I often cut the cool down a bit short. This year, I want to be fully focused and make every training minute count.

3) Improve strength-to-weight ratio. Earlier this year I blogged about how the rehab for my broken jaw led me to do consistent core workouts. That process took me from not being able to hold a plank for more than 10 seconds to planking for over 3 minutes. I am so much stronger now but at the same time, I know that strength is something I really need to improve upon. The difference is now I know how. In addition to doing 20-min core workouts at home 4 to 5 days a week, I’m also adding visits to the weight room immediately after swimming. Fortunately, my partner E. is my super-knowledgeable personal trainer on that front, so I’m in good hands.

This week in review:

Swim:

This week I signed up for a McGill gym & pool membership, added on locker & towel service and headed straight for the pool for my first swim since… Challenge Penticton in August? Yep, that long. Afterwards, my arms ached the next day, but I did actually enjoy the swim workout and am looking forward to going back.

Weight training:

I hit the weight room for the first time and was greeted by Patrick the delightful, energetic weightroom staff member who told me the tour started with a hug. That may sound strange, but was kind of funny-awesome and it made the experience of working in a new facility more welcoming and I felt like I could easily approach him if I had other questions afterwards. To me, that’s a big deal in spaces that can be “meathead” environments. So, thanks for the tour and for the hug, Patrick!

McGill Fitness Centre

Bike:

I assembled my Tacx trainer and got my bike set up this week. The Tuesday workout was a cadence-ramp workout, while Thursday’s was a strength-endurance climbs workout. It felt so good to be back on the bike, even indoors (I actually have no problem being on the trainer indoors and have done many 4- to 5-hour workouts before). The trainer is a brand I haven’t used before and I bought the cheapest, but best quality one I could find, as I already have two other trainers back home. I’m still working on creating more resistance though, since in both workouts this week I maxed out the gears before reaching the resistance I wanted. Fortunately, I have a few tips to try still. Here’s the only shot I have of the bike workouts:

Run: I did a 45-minute run this week to remind my legs about running. Wake up, legs! I ended up doing that indoors on the treadmill because it was wet, snowy, and slushy outside. One of the perks of the McGill fitness centre is that the treadmill limit seems to be one hour, rather than the usual 30 minutes. I really appreciated that, since I rarely do a run under 30 minutes.

Challenges: As I mentioned, I’m absolutely loving the McGill facilities. They’re not far from home and everything I need is there. However! The indoor track is currently closed because students are writing exams (I completely forgot that many exams are written in the fieldhouse, even though I’ve both written and supervised the writing of exams there); and the pool is closed for maintenance next week, which means I’ll need to find other facilities during that time. On the upside, they extended my membership to credit me for not being able to use these facilities, so all in all, things are good.

If you have any tips on learning to love swimming, please let me know in the comments!

Oh? Off Season Comes to An End

Oh? Yes. Off-season is about to come to an end — just when I was starting to get used to the rhythm of doing, well, nothing active. Nevertheless, it’s been a busy week.

Settling into My New/Old Home:

1. McGill University / Concordia University

Getting settled in to Montreal has been, thankfully, relatively painless. I’ve lived in Montreal for several years, on and off, since my early 20s. My partner and I have a condo here; even when I’m not living here, I visit and spend time in Montreal at least once or twice a year. In many ways, I think of it as my intellectual, linguistic, literary, social community. So it was easy to re-connect with all the facets of that old life and in the past week, in particular, I’ve so enjoyed seeing old friends and colleagues, attending a symposium on Literary Audio (hooray for audiophiliacs!) at Concordia University, getting my McGill alumni library card and spending a few hours retrieving research books from the McLennan Library, speaking French and wandering around the Plateau area of Montreal.

Mordecai Richler Reading Room, Concordia University

Depanneur, Plateau Mont Royal

The bigger challenge for me was finding triathlon training facilities and community, since the last time I lived full-time in Montreal I had barely heard of “triathlon” and certainly didn’t bike or swim more than a handful of times. Little did I expect to find a “triathlon home” at my alma mater, but this is exactly what happened: after researching several facilities (pool here, gym there, but nothing seemed quite right), it occurred to me that I should check the McGill gym rates for alumni. Turns out they’re quite good! Then, I thought, why not take a look at the McGill Triathlon Club, which I was expecting to be open to registered students only. I quickly discovered the club is open to alumni and members of the public and it looks really great! I especially appreciated their word of welcome to diverse athletes:

“The McGill Triathlon Club is a group of ambitious, athletic individuals of all ages and backgrounds.

The McGill Triathlon Club recognizes and supports a positive diversity of abilities, classes, cultures, sizes, ages, gender expression and sexual orientation.

The club is open to the community at large in addition to servicing McGill students, staff and alumni.“

 

2. Getting By With a Little Help from My Social Media Friends

I’ve also been really fortunate to have some of my Montreal-based social media friends give me great recommendations and advice for setting up here in the city. A special thanks to @henki for his advice on shops, training facilities, and swim coaching especially. Through Henri, I discovered the amazing Anastasia Polito and her EnergiFit squad, which I’m especially looking forward to swim training with. Thanks also to Jules Gorham, one of my 2016 Betty Designs team members, for helping me look for an indoor trainer and giving me loads of great advice. I can’t wait to meet these two in person, as well as TriEqual co-director Valérie Lefebvre and several other Montreal-based Instagram folks. It’s also been wonderful to catch up with my friend Bronwyn H., a bike mechanic and translator with whom I had some great conversations about equity and the bike industry — thanks, Bronwyn.

3. Building the Bike

A few days ago, in anticipation of the start up of this week’s training, I finally built my bike, which is currently getting a tune-up at Cycles Gervais Rioux by the super talented mechanic Marielle, who I highly recommend:

And bought a very basic trainer:

And continuing the theme of merging work and training life together, I’ll be training indoors in my little study. Fortunately, the view isn’t bad:

With this week’s training plan in hand, I’m looking forward to getting back to the #swimbikerun routine and finding a new work-life balance here in Montreal.

Lanzarote Pre-Season Week 3

Mont Royal, Montréal

It’s been a busy few weeks! On Tuesday I flew across (most of) the country to arrive in Montréal, which will be my home for several months. I’m pretty excited to be here. Since this trip has been in the works for quite some time now, before I left Kelowna I did my utmost to see everyone and get some final fun rides and runs in there with friends.

Kelowna Running Club’s Pub Relay:

On November 13, I joined the fabulous folks from Kelowna Kinesiology & Orthoquest for Kelowna Running Club’s Pub Relay. I’d never done a pub relay before and it was a ridiculous amount of fun! The day before the relay a friend asked me offhand: “are you good at drinking and running?”

Me: “What do you mean ‘drinking and running,'”?

Them: “You know this is a pub relay, right?”

Me: “It involves drinking beer!??”

Somehow it hadn’t occurred to me that the pub relay would involve drinking beer. I guess I hadn’t thought about it too much before I agreed to do it! Not that I have anything against it — I just hadn’t contemplated this part of the race.

Team “Agony of da Feet”

Well, Team “Agony of da Feet” totally rocked. Note the flaming shoes and hats — this was a speedy and super fun team to be on. And I’m proud to say that despite having overlooked the beer detail, I managed to put back my half pint in a single gulp after having run nearly 8km. Sweet! The best part of this relay event was cheering on our team members and the folks on the other teams too.

 

First Aid & CPR Re-certification:

Before leaving Kelowna I also took the opportunity to update and upgrade some certifications and training. First up was my First Aid and CPR, in preparation for the upcoming X Elle Cycling season:

Don’t worry folks, this is just a drill! All slings & splints are demos only! Joking aside, this was a really great refresher course led by an instructor who works for the local search and rescue. All I can say is I’d be happy to be rescued by any of the folks who completed the course that day — everyone had a lot of good, calm energy and serious competence. Certified!

National Coaching Certification Program (NCCP) Cycling Coaching:

Next up Alison and I completed the first module in the NCCP / Cycling BC Ready to Race coaching level.

Alison & I are through the 14-hour NCCP “Training to Race” module

The session was offered by Cycling BC’s Richard Wooles, who is a former athlete and coach for multiple Olympic teams. He’s also a brilliant and passionate facilitator of coaching training, so I highly recommend signing up for a course with him. He took us through the NCCP “Training to Race” technical material, shared some enlightening anecdotes, and assessed our coaching (this time on pretend bikes!). Maximum amount of material crammed into two days — it’s a good thing we got these great workbooks to take away with us for review.

 

Hill-seeking with friends:

To be sure, I also got a few rides in before I left, despite the weather being only semi-cooperative:

 

Packing and Travelling (with bike & cat):

And before I knew it, I was packing my bags and heading to Montreal.

You wouldn’t believe the amount of careful packing and unpacking I did before I decided I had everything I needed and nothing extra. Actually, my friends will totally believe it. I think I began packing 4 weeks before the actual flight. I needed to be prepared for Montreal winter; Montreal spring; a trip to Florida; doing research at the university; going to conferences; swim/bike/run training; and Ironman Lanzarote. Do I bring my little cycling cap? Or not? Two swim suits? Or one? I was also bringing my cat! Initially I had planned to fit all my clothes and things into a little carry-on bag, but eventually I decided this was kind of silly. Why not just take an expedition pack afterall, since I had to check a bag? So here’s (kind of) what it looked like (spot the kitty):

Montreal: Training Updates

Having arrived safely and (mostly) uneventfully in Montreal, I’m sorry to say that since my coach has me on two weeks of complete rest, I have no training updates. I haven’t even unpacked my bike yet! But I have been busy scoping out bike shops and training groups and training facilities (where will I swim? will I run track in the winter or not? will I get a gym membership? or workout from home?). I’ll let you know the answers in my next post!

Meanwhile, I’ve been out re-acquainting myself with my beloved city and hanging out with my beloved gf and kitty:

 

If you have any training suggestions (routes? groups? facilities?) in Montreal, please let me know in the comments below!

What Does it Mean to Be “Just Running” and “Just Riding”?

I’ve had people ask me why I’m involved in developing women’s cycling groups and write about women in sports. It’s 2016, you have equality. Just go run or ride! What’s the big deal?

Just Running:

Last week while I was out “just running” at 7:15pm in my neighbourhood, I was quietly pursued by a guy in jeans and a big jacket (i.e. not running clothes) who began running after me and then quietly walked when I started walking. I knew someone was following me way too closely and was about to turn around and confront them when a woman riding her bike intervened, having observed this guy starting to follow me. She knew something was not right. And so did I. When I later told this story to two guys I know, their responses were “ha! he probably just wanted your number!” and “maybe he was just running for the bus. You don’t actually know he was following you. You only have that other woman’s perspective on the situation.”

If you think he just wanted my number, I’d like you to read this.

(More recently, I told the story to some other guys who totally got it. Thank you for that.)

This is not the first time this has happened to me. Guys, it happens to us all. the. time.

 

Just Riding:

This week, my friend Carrie Karsgaard wrote a really excellent post about some of the stunningly sexist and racist local mountain-bike trail names she came across, which I understand include “Squaw Hollow,” “TheRapist,” and “rubherdown.” Like, what the actual fuck? You can read her blog post here.

The local MTBco president took a proactive position on this, acknowledging the issue, and they will be replacing those signs in consultation with the builder and local community. But I’m now watching the fall out of the response on Facebook where some dudes in our local community are (loudly) defending these names and crying PC foul. To those guys: fuck you. To the others who are stepping up and speaking against the racism and misogyny in these names and in cycling culture in general: thank you. Thank you. Thank you. We need to hear your voices.

So what’s the big deal? The thing is, I would like to “just ride.” The thing is that we live in a culture that actively perpetuates and/or passively endorses this kind of violence (symbolic or otherwise). Or at best, tries to explain it away with comments like: “Maybe he was just running for the bus! You don’t know.” “It’s a reference to a comedy clip!” “First-world problems!”E

What’s the big deal? When women go out for a run, ride the trails, this is the climate we do it in. And it needs to change.

 

NB: I know there is much that needs to be addressed with respect to participation in women’s cycling and running groups — and sports in general — with respect to class privilege, white privilege, the need to more actively welcome and include trans women. We need to talk about running and riding on unceded Syilx territory, as Carrie explains so eloquently in her post:

crown land – land I (as a syrah-drinking trail runner) might see as a fine chunk of Okanagan recreation and wine country but that has never (in fact) been handed over to said crown by the Syilx people who know it like the backs of their hands. Who know it because they have inhabited it, lived from it, and traversed it for millennia (before mountain biking was a twinkle in anyone’s eye). So, by naming our trails in any way that ignores this, much less in such a way as to overtly degrade, demean, and dehumanize, we lay one more crust over this fact. A crust that means we continue to forget that this land isn’t ours to name (which could be what we want – is it?).

That needs to be part of the discussion and this post is just scratching the surface.

Lanzarote Pre-Season Week 2

West Kelowna vineyards

It’s autumn in the Okanagan and — as long as it’s sunny — it just doesn’t get any lovelier than this. My training in the October-November months is been a little less structured and a little more social. It’s been really fun connecting (and reconnecting) with some of the amazing friends in Kelowna’s cycling community. Here’s this week’s recap:

Swim: No swimming this week. But soon. Honest.

Bike: I had a really nice long ride last weekend. I decided to venture off on a solo ride through West Kelowna, somewhere I haven’t explored much before. I wanted to ride Westside Road and entertained the possibility of riding around the lake (roughly 120km? I didn’t quite get there).

Since I was going out solo and there are few bike lanes on the west side, I decided this would be a good time to test out Strava Premium’s “beacon” feature: it allows you to send your live location to up to 3 friends/family. So before heading out, I pinged my partner Erin and my trusty training pal Alison with my live-tracker link. They confirmed that they could see my location on the map, and so off I went.

After crossing the bridge into West Kelowna, I headed south along the lake, not realizing the road was a dead-end. Oops! Well, no big deal; this was an exploration ride after all.  I turned and headed north, this time toward Westside Rd, which follows the lakeshore. Because there is no bike lane on this road, I stayed close to the shoulder while still being visible and allowing myself a little bit of room to manoeuvre. It’s not my favourite cycling situation but most of the cars were very respectful and gave me a metre’s range while passing. I, in turn, waved any overly cautious car past when the oncoming lane was clear. After several kilometres along the hilly road, I arrived at this wildlife advertisement:

Oh, sweet mountain sheep! I rode on for another 10km in hopes of spotting a herd of these guys but sadly, I discovered instead that this sign was blatantly false advertising. Not only was there not 10km worth of mountain sheep, there were zero mountain sheep to be seen. I guess early morning or dusk are probably better times to see them. After Bear Creek, there were fewer cars on the road and the surrounding woods seemed to get quieter; I suddenly began to get a funny bear feeling — as one does in this season. At that point, I decided I would turn around and go explore a more populated area. This new direction took me out and back on Boucherie road where I stopped every so often to admire the views and the vineyards (see the header photo above). Sunday’s ride was more of a meandering ride than a proper training ride, but it was super fun and with my time in the Okanagan getting shorter, I’m keen to see as many new areas as possible.

Later in the week, I met up with my pal Erika. We’ve been going on near-weekly #llamarides, which involve choosing routes that have the highest possibility of, yes, you guessed it: llamas. But goats, sheep, and alpacas also count if we don’t find enough llamas. In between the llama-spotting, we usually hit topics ranging from social issues to literature to classics and related subjects. Best formula for fun bike riding!

Here we are with these three sheep friends.

The goats are as enthusiastic about us as we are about them.

That’s how we keep the fun-factor in cycling!

Run:

On the weekend I did an hour’s easy run with Alison and later later in the week I joined my friend Dustin for a track session. I haven’t done any real track workouts this year, but I do love the track, so I decide to take my tempo run there. It was a short tempo run: 10 minutes of sub 10km race pace.

Apple Bowl

Then, on Thursday, I joined the awesome CyclePath women (Roseanne & Sherry) for an evening hike up Knox Mountain, which rewarded us with this stunning view of the city lights:

Kelowna by night.

Core & stretching: In my last post I mentioned that I’ve been working on making strength sessions a regular part of my week (5-6 days/wk, in fact). But one of the things I’ve really been neglecting (and I mean really) has been stretching. The flexibility of my posterior chain has been one of my major limiters for years now and I confess I’ve done relatively little to address that. (For those of you who did a double-take back there, “posterior chain” is just fancy kinesiology speak for “a group of muscles consisting predominantly of tendons and ligaments on the posterior of the body. Examples of these muscles include the biceps femoris, gluteus maximus, erector spinae muscle group, trapezius, and posterior deltoids.” So keep your pants on.).

I used to be very flexible in my teens and 20s and I still think of myself that way, even though that’s not the case. Nowhere was this more obvious than when Alison and I took some fun photos this past weekend: I attempted a few yoga poses which ended in crushing hilarity. Although I haven’t done them in years, I still think of myself as competent at cartwheels, front handsprings, back walkovers, and front walkovers. Not so! One of my attempts was caught on video and I will not be sharing it here, as there was lots of swearing to go with it.

Side plank

Challenges: I’ll take my cue, then, and say that my challenge for the winter is to get my flexibility back (although we may not go as far as front handsprings). How to do this? Well, I’ve had success with doing core routines at home, so I think I’ll move into doing daily yoga at home as well.

Motivation: This week’s motivation came from the amazing women in Kelowna who are staying active and have been so welcoming at the events & adventures they organize. Thank you!

How are you staying motivated this fall?

Lanzarote: Pre-Season Week 1

View from Knox Mountain, First Lookout

It probably seems a bit premature to start writing about my preparation for Ironman Lanzarote, which is still 7 months away. Why so anxious? It’s still off season! relax!

Shouldn’t I just be chilling out and considering my options?

Credit: Hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.ca

Suffice to say, this is not what I’ve been doing. I try to stay active to avoid the above situation. In mid November, I’ll be heading to Montreal for several months leading up to Lanzarote, which will mean virtually all of my training (swimming and cycling, in any case) will take place indoors during the freezing cold winter. So until I head eastward, I want get as much mileage in as possible outdoors, and especially climbing. Must climb all the things!

To that end, here’s this week’s training report:

Swim: um, no swimming to report. [cringe]

Bike: Hill reps this week took me to Knox Mountain where I did 4x 6min hills, which worked out well: it takes me 6 minutes to climb to the first lookout at 7/10 effort. I love riding up Knox Mountain because there’s inevitably an amazing view to take in (see above). Here’s me, having just finished my last repeat:

Run: ever since the BMO Okanagan Half Marathon on October 9th, I’ve found myself filled with renewed enthusiasm for running. My early-season focus was running (I did the BMO Vancouver Marathon back in May) but somehow late in the summer, I just wasn’t feeling the love anymore. But we’re back, baby! I managed to pull off a PB (1:45:05) at the Okanagan Half despite having not run much at all in September and having done no speedwork in ages. This week I had a tempo run which included 2x 10min @ halfmarathon-pace building to 10km-pace. It felt hard but good.

Core: I’ve been doing 30min of strength-training 5-6 times a week and it has really improved my form. I find it very easy to do: whenever I need a break from writing or admin work, I take a 30-minute break and get my core workout done. My hard rule is that it needs to be done before I go to sleep at night. No core workout, no sleeping — so get on it!

Challenges: 1) It’s always a little more difficult to get outside to train when it’s cold and rainy; we’re now in that season in the Okanagan where it’s getting colder and wetter, so this will be my challenge for the upcoming week. 2) I’m working on “digging deep” and working harder in my training. I tend to be very good at going easy for a long time, but less good at pushing my upper limits and capacity to hurt for awhile. So I’ll be trying to improve on that in the coming weeks.

Inspiration: The biggest source of inspiration for me this week was Siri Lindley‘s new memoir.

I won’t go into too much detail here since I’ll be reviewing the book soon on my blog, but what I find so inspiring about her story is 1) how far she came, from not being able to swim to being a world champion, and 2) how hard she worked to get there, particularly when she was training with Brett Sutton. It’s an amazing story!

A Few Mountains: Setting Goals for 2017

It’s off-season! For me that means sleeping in a little later, working out with a little less structure, and trying new things like 100km gravel bike races. It also means time to do some goal-setting for 2017.

Every year I try to do a race that’s big enough that it scares me a bit and excites me a lot — something that requires a good deal of training and preparation. This is good for me, you see, because otherwise I’m the queen of winging it: I have enough fitness and lack of self-consciousness that if something looks like fun, then heck, I’ll just give it a go. Cool as a cucumber. That “just try it” attitude is helpful in a lot of ways: it means I’m pretty calm at races; I usually race within my limits; and I’m not easily intimidated by challenges. On the other hand, it means that unless I’ve set ambitious goals for myself that require dedication to a 30-week training plan, I have a hard time taking things seriously. Truth be told, if I didn’t set big race goals, I probably wouldn’t exercise at all except for commuting.

So what’s on the horizon for 2017, you ask? I forget whose idea this was, but my triathlon buddy Alison and I hatched this plan to go do one of the world’s hardest Ironmans:

You may recall this was my first Ironman back in 2014 and it seemed like a good idea to go try to get another one of these:

Joking aside, we are pretty darn excited. And lucky! We have amazing support from coach & pro cyclist Jordan Cheyne from Peak Form Coaching, as well as advice from former pro-Ironman champ Mel Spooner from Endurance Health and Fitness. Jordan’s been the most motivating, dedicated coach and I’m stoked to be working with him for this upcoming year as he devises a training plan toward Lanzarote. We recently visited Mel at Paradigm Naturopathic Medicine to chat with her about the specifics of the Lanzarote Ironman course. Mel won Lanzarote in 1998 as a pro (the same year she finished 4th pro woman at Kona) and so not only does she know this course inside and out, but she also brings an amazing outlook and philosophy to Iron-distance racing. Suffice to say we all learned a lot and had a wonderful time talking with her!

Kay, Mel, and Alison

Kay, Jordan, and Alison

Above our heads is a reminder of Mel’s philosophy: do what you love / love what you do.

So Alison and I can’t wait to embark on this triathlon journey together and get started into our Ironman Lanzarote training. We’ve been training together regularly for several years now. But one of our major challenges this year will be that we’ll be in different cities for pretty much the entire training period: I’ll be in Montreal for the winter and spring leading into the race; Alison will be in Kelowna, on the other side of the country. We won’t actually see each other until we arrive in the UK in May, 2017. So we’ll be keeping a regular weekly training log on our respective blogs, reflecting on the particular challenges of training in different cities — tune in!

Here’s the current level of enthusiasm:

BecauseICanTri

SeeKayTri

What goals have you set for 2017?

A String of Personal Records & A Village

Vancouver Marathon, 2016. Photo credit: Kaya Fraser

All Quiet on the Blog Front

The blog’s been unusually quiet. Actually, it’s been 5 months since my last post — I left you hanging the day before I was getting my jaw unwired after 6 weeks of not being able to move it even a millimetre. Why so quiet? Well, partly because the whole experience was so exhausting (writing and sitting at the desk were two of the most difficult tasks; talking and eating were the other worst); despite my best efforts at eating 9 times a day, I’d lost 15lbs. But mostly, I kept thinking if I waited just a bit until I was “fully recovered,” I’d be able to write just one final post about my damn jaw and I could move on to writing about more interesting things.  What I’ve discovered is that the recovery process was way, way longer than I thought: my bones have healed; my jaw and bite are in a new place now; I’ve recovered 38mm of range of motion (“normal” is 45-55mm, which I won’t ever have again) so on a good day I can eat a banana without much trouble; but I still have 2 to 3 years of orthodontic work ahead of me to correct my teeth so I can bite/chew properly again. Even though I only chipped a few teeth, the result of constructing a new bite meant my teeth have pushed against each other and caused the development of an open bite and some occlusion problems. Fun times. It’s kind of like having a pair of scissors with a loose bolt. They bend and rip the paper but they don’t cut very well.

It may surprise you to learn that in the midst of recovering from breaking my jaw, teaching two courses with 70+ students during the term, going to 2 or more rehab/medical appointments per week,  I also got back onto a proper training plan with a new coach starting January 1st, 2016. In many ways, the training was easier than sitting at my desk, typing or reading — the latter activities exhausted my already weakened face and neck muscles. (Turns out those muscles atrophy after being immobilized for 6 weeks.)  So triathlon training was something I was, thankfully, highly encouraged to do by my HR contact-person, whose job it was to reintegrate me into work. I’ll say more about the actual recovery/rehab in another post, but on to the the triathlon news.

A String of PRs

Fast-forward to May 1st weekend. I had just finished grading 70+ essays and exams and was off to Vancouver to run my second ever marathon (see photo above). It was an amazingly fun weekend: I got to catch up with my close friend Kaya, who hosted me. And i had a great run: I crossed the line in 3:59:21, exactly on target, taking over an hour off my previous marathon PR. It was a  massively different experience from the Okanagan marathon, which finished like this:

Hobbling toward the finish and relieved to be there! Photo credit: Dirk Handke

After the Vancouver marathon, I took a much-needed week of real time off, which I hadn’t had since before the accident. I spent the week in Florida, staying with my dear friends Julia and Tom, who had been following and supporting my recovery closely. For the first time in 6 months, I could finally relax.

 

Well, sort of relax.  Although she let me lounge around the pool, Julia had also entered me in a local Women-for-Women 5km race (with my approval) which took place 6 days after my marathon. On Wednesday I was still so stiff from Sunday’s marathon that I could only manage to trot 500m at a 7:00/km pace before having to walk again. Saturday’s 5km did not seem realistic. But by the time Saturday rolled around, I was feeling pretty good and I ran a warm up with Julia (who was over 20 weeks pregnant by that point), Benjamina, and Travis. The Women-for-Women 5km marked another PR for me: 23:16, good enough for 16/584 overall.

Women for Women 5km, Lake Worth FL. Photo credit: Julia Kelk

Two weeks later, back in Kelowna, I had another 5km PR at the EK’s Grill Heart & Stroke fundraiser run: 22:52. And finally, this past weekend, after building up to my first triathlon of the year, I did the Oliver Half Iron, taking 2 minutes off my previous PR for a finish time of 6:22:31, in 42C heat, which made things extra interesting. I know it doesn’t look like it, but I’m actually feeling pretty thrilled in this pic:

These aren’t the fastest times in the larger scheme of things, but they are my fastest times and I’m pleased with them. A string of back-to-back PRs feels great! So how do you go from total burnout and recovering from a broken jaw to a series of PRs? You know that cliche “it takes a village…”? Well it’s true and although the PRs are exciting it’s the village that I actually want to talk about in this post.

The Village

The villagers fall into a few key categories:

The Training Buddy

These are the people who swam, biked, and ran with me throughout the past 5 months, even when I was super, super slow and not able to go very far. They trained with me anyway or they took time to do an extra swim, bike, or run with me so I had company. You’re not all pictured below, but you know who you are.

 

The Coach

In January, I started working with Jordan Cheyne, a Kelowna-based coach who specializes in training endurance athletes. Jordan’s an impressive pro athlete in his own right (I’ll let you follow the link above to find out more on that) but what I was really looking for was a coach who was the right fit for me. What convinced me, after talking with him, was the way Jordan took pride in his age-group athletes’ results — not just those of his elite athletes and his juniors — and his high level of organization and communication. Jordan turned out to be fantastic: he uses a combination of email and Strava to deliver the plan that’s tailored to me; he regularly checks my workouts on Strava (kudos!), responds quickly to my occasional question, is a great motivator, and sets realistic goals for someone of my level. It’s a formula that works well for me and as a result my motivation is high and I’m completing nearly 100% of the plan. Every. Single. Week.

Coach Jordan! Photo credit: Tru Cycling

I’ve also gotten more involved myself in coaching & ride-leading over the past few months, giving back to communities that have supported me over the past few years, and it’s been incredibly inspiring and motivating. I’m currently involved in the ChainLine Women‘s Monday-night recovery ride; The Red Devils Cycling Academy, and X Elle Women’s Cycling Association.

 

The Strength-Training Buddy

At one of my lowest moments back in January when I could barely hold my head up and was facing a lot of physio for my neck and back, my friend Alison (becauseicantri) reassured me that this would be a great opportunity to build strength and come back stronger than ever. At the time, I was grateful for the encouragement, but I secretly thought “rubbish! I’m losing all this training time. Plus, despite my best efforts, I have never consistently done core workouts before.” Three things changed that:

1) fear. There’s nothing like not being able to talk/eat and having a floppy neck and sore back to motivate a person to do 100 little neck sit-ups a day prescribed by the physio, let me tell you. Well, in all honesty, my physio Vince prescribed 30/day but in my enthusiasm/fear, I turned that into 100/day. By the end of February, I was the world champion of neck sit-ups! According to my surgeon, that was a key part of my faster-than-expected recovery. (Thanks to Vince at Sun City Physiotherapy for getting me back in the game and to Sean MacMillan for the referral.).

2) accountability. By mid-March, I had become so keen on doing these 100 per day neck sit-ups that I decided someone else should join me in the challenge: Alison, my strength-training buddy. I sent her this text:

I’m such a jerk, LOL. 100 pushups per day. Happy birthday, friend! Photo: Alison R

Since neck sit-ups aren’t especially useful for triathlon training, we opted to do 100 push-ups a day for one month, before moving on to another exercise.

Alison has a hilarious and awesome blog post about this still-ongoing adventure, which you can read here. Basically, the concept is that you do 100 pushups per day (in whatever number of sets you can manage. I started with 10×10 and progressed to 4×25). When finished, you text your training buddy the number “100” to confirm the workout’s complete for the day. Trust me: receiving the other person’s “100” text before you’ve sent yours really lights a fire underneath you. But the key to this workout challenge is that it’s simple and can be done anywhere (office, home, airport, etc). It’s important not to be too ambitious: although I couldn’t do a straight set of 100, the total number of pushups was always doable within a total span of 30 minutes or so, if I was in a rush. The challenge sets you up to succeed. As an added benefit, the 100 challenge also meant I was getting down on my yoga mat on a regular basis each day. In between sets, it was only natural that I’d do a few other exercises too, which made it easy to gradually build into a program. Go team!

3) education. I also went to visit my favourite local kinesiologist at Kelowna Kinesiology, Lise Dallien Macmillan, who did a movement assessment and gave me a set of exercises to address some of the limitations I had/have. The result is I’m now stronger and more flexible than I’ve ever been… just like Alison predicted!

The benefit was really noticeable in recent races. This increase in glute, quad, and core strength made it almost feel as though I was running on someone else’s legs.

 

The Annoying Friend 🙂

The annoying friend category deserves special mention here. You shouldn’t have too many of these but it’s safe — in fact, advisable — to have one or two. This is the person who comes up with the wildest ideas, who checks in daily and holds you accountable, who pushes you to go harder when you already feel like you’re going to puke.  Better yet, they do the crazy shit with you! My own most annoying (but super lovable!) friend is Julia who, for my birthday, bought me an entry to that 5km race less than a week after the marathon and was all over the course-side taking photos. I know I told you that already; but that’s not all. Julia, who normally runs a sub-20-minute 5km, was also 27 weeks pregnant at the time:

She didn’t just take photos though. At the 4km mark in the race, as I was beginning to flag a bit, Julia appeared and started running with me (!?!?!) and telling me I could do it, keep it up, go faster. Gruh! Arrrg! Knowing exactly how much she can push me, Julia did this all the way until just before the finish line, where she suddenly disappeared and I was left with this photo:

That is one way to get a PR. Thank you, Julia!!

Julia her own phenomenal story of running a 5km race recently when she was 30 weeks pregnant, which you should definitely check out. She finished 7/111 in her age group and 62/772 overall. Amazing!

Until next time!

Broken Jaw: The 6-Week Update & 3 Lists

Tonight I did something I haven’t done in over 6 weeks: I went to the grocery store and bought food that isn’t strictly destined to be pulped into soups or shakes (aka: liquid nutrition).

Don’t be fooled: I won’t be eating these raw. Everything you see is now destined to be steamed and/or mushed.

Yesterday marked 6 weeks after my bike crash and tomorrow I finally get my jaw “unwired” (is that the right term?). It’s felt like a long time. You might expect me to be excited. Lots of people have remarked things like “I bet you can’t wait. You’ll be able to eat solid food again! What will you eat first?” or “I’m sure you can’t wait to be able to open your mouth. You’ll be able to talk again.” At one point I probably thought those things too. But if I’ve learned one thing in the past six weeks it’s that I didn’t have a clue how long this recovery was going to take. I still don’t. For instance, there was a good hour in the ER when I thought I had dislocated (rather than fractured) my jaw and they were just going to snap it back into place (is that even what they do to a dislocated jaw?). I imagined I would then go on my merry way. That naivete seems absurd to me now. Not really understanding my situation, I also tried to stop the ER doc from writing an note for me to be off work for 2-3 weeks (I don’t need that. I can’t be off work; I am a professor). In the end, I took the note, still thinking I wouldn’t need it. I was so wrong.

The potential length of recovery has been something I’ve been slow to come to terms with (partly because my medical professional friends have wisely counseled me not to do any research on my injury. You’ll find out why if you keep reading). When it became clear my jaw was to be wired shut for 6 weeks, I focused on healing and I’ve paced myself through the situation with the help of a lot of friends and my awesome girlfriend.

So, why am I not totally stoked about tomorrow, you wonder? In many ways I am, of course. I can’t wait to brush the insides of my freakin’ teeth for the first time in a month and a half. I never thought I’d say this but I’m actually excited to eat mashed potatoes and mashed vegetables (assuming I’m going to be able to do that). [Correction/update: I was too optimistic. There will be no brushing the insides of my teeth or eating mashed potatoes for quite some time still] But tomorrow marks more of a beginning than it does an end — the beginning of a lot of work and finding answers to a lot of unknowns. My jaw has been completely immobilized for 6 weeks; its broken hinges have healed, both of them bent permanently forward the socket. My jaw is now in a new position and the surrounding muscles need to regain strength and coordination to learn to move it. So it’s time for the jaw to get strong and agile. I’m told that with rehab, I should eventually be able to open my mouth two to three fingers’ width. That doesn’t seem like much range of motion but hey, it’s more than I’ve currently got.

The next stage will likely be as long or longer (between one month and “several” months) than what I’ve just finished and involves super strong elastics replacing the wires to realign my bite. Fun times. I’m told there’s roughly an 80% chance of success. In my world, that’s a low A grade: overall very good but not awesome. And if it doesn’t work, they’ll have to re-break my  jaw (that part I’ve known since the beginning). So tomorrow marks the beginning of finding out what the real outcome is.

But it’s the new year and it’s a tradition to make “best” and “worst” lists, and I thought I would make a few lists of my own. And I’m determined to end on a positive note, which is why my lists start with the sucky things, move to the comical, and end with the good things from the last 6 weeks. There are also far more funny and good things than things that have sucked, so take heart. Ready?

3 Things That Have Sucked

1. Accidentally reading about potential TMJ complications/issues. Despite my doctor-friends advising me not to do this, I came across these details by mistake as I was trying to find some physio information. I truly wish I hadn’t. I’ll skip the details here, but when you break those little jaw hinges, the potential issues suck big time.
2. Holidays. I’m not going to lie. Having your jaw wired over the holidays kind of sucks. At some point it dawned on me that I wouldn’t be eating any festive dinners in the usual sense; that was a low moment. December is the season of going to parties, social gatherings, having people over for dinners, and catching up with people. I normally love these, especially because I divide my time between two cities 4000km away from each other, so I am always looking forward to catching up with people. This year was a challenge. I relished the opportunity to see people and be out, but it was hard to be around people eating delicious foods while I sipped a can of Boost. But not to worry, I plan to make up for this later. (And the situation was not all mopey. See also Erin in the list of “Best Things.”)
3. Calorie intake. Getting enough calories to pass between your teeth is a whole job in itself. If you’re doubtful, I suggest you try clamping your jaw shut and see what you can get past your teeth. Initially my girlfriend (bless her) took care of prepping this extravagant liquid diet and then she made a chart for me when I took over this task myself. Even with the help of the chart, however, I found making and eating 9 meals a day was exhausting and time-consuming (so much dish-washing!) while I was also working full time. I would often find myself falling behind my calorie schedule and feeling sleepy or disoriented in the middle of the day as a result. I’ve only lost about 9 lbs over the last 6 weeks and I know it would have been a lot more if it hadn’t been for E’s diligence. I truly couldn’t have gotten through this without E and all the generous friends who brought me nutritious soups and helped me get groceries (see Friends entry in “Best Things”).
   

   The famous chart, by Erin.

 

6 Things That Have Been Annoying But Also Mildly Amusing:

1. The moment when you go to seal the holiday card envelopes and realize it’s impossible to lick them. Ditto for coffee spoons or the spoon you just used to scoop almond butter.
2. Lip gloss. All the time. Because there is literally no other way to moisturize.
3. Blowing out candles is basically impossible. Best not to light them. Hope you’re not having a birthday during those six weeks.
4. Not being able to make yourself heard if there are more than 3 people talking in a room. “Sorry, what did you say?” “Never mind. Really.” You can talk to the person next to you. Unless there’s music playing, in which case, you can’t really talk to anyone.
5. Yawning. It can’t be stopped, but nor can you actually yawn with your jaw clamped shut. The result is something that feels like your jaw being ripped apart.
6. Crying. I tried it once in a moment of being utterly overwhelmed by the kindness of friends. Dammit. The result:  your nose runs and then you can’t really breathe at all and then, because you can’t breathe, it feels like you’re dying. I highly advise against it.

 

6 Things That Have Been Awesome (The Best Things):

1. No more teeth-phobia. I can’t say I would ever recommend this method, but smashing my face into the pavement has completely cured me of any fear of teeth or dentists. As some of you know, I couldn’t even talk about teeth before this. The very thought of broken teeth made me want to puke. Now, on the scale of things, basic dental work suddenly seems like a breeze. And it looks like I’ll need a fair bit of it after all is said and done, so bring it on.
2. My sinus issues are cured. This was unexpected, to say the least. I used to have one annoying finicky sinus, which meant I could usually only breathe out of one side of my nose (is this TMI for you?). It seems that smashing my face into the pavement also cured that. Now I can breathe well again for the first time in, like, 15 years. Again, this is definitely not a method I’d recommend but since there are few upsides to breaking your face, I’m taking this one. Welcome back, sinus.
3. Being active. I feel really lucky to have been able to get back to running, indoor cycling, & cross-country skiing, even if only for a low-intensity hour here and there. Low-intensity is ideal for the off season though — yay. Conversely, the activity that causes my body (neck and shoulders) the most strain is sitting at my desk typing or reading/writing — things I’ve done many, many hours of in the past few weeks. So getting back into training has been a nice balance, especially with friends:
   

   5km New Year’s Run with K & A. Photo credit: @canadianironamy

4. Colleagues. The HR person (T) with a physio background who has been brilliant and cheers me up every time I see her, in part because she totally “gets” what’s going on with this injury — namely, its physical side effects — and has made some of the most helpful suggestions on that front. All the colleagues & grad students who have helped me finish up with my previous term and get started on teaching this term, even though I can’t really address a class yet. These folks have been so awesome.
5. Friends. You have been and continue to be so amazing. I’m constantly humbled by the generosity & kindness of friends — those who were there at the beginning when I was very much in need of all the helps; those who have continued to check in on me; those who’ve given me advice; who sent lovely things in the post; those who have anticipated things I’m going to need before I did; those who helped with groceries (thanks A, A, & J), delivered delicious soups that were still warm (thank you, Dan & family!).
6. Erin. The culinary genius who is my girlfriend. The person who figured out how to make me liquid versions of every “real” course — including duck a l’orange — that we served our friends for Christmas dinner. Inventor of savoury salad shakes. Creator of soups with several layers of flavours. Solver of logistical problems. Most amazing person. I am so, so lucky.

 

Closed-mouth smile in solidarity with my broken jaw.

And, in case you wondered — after all this talk of delicious soups and culinary excellence — what the first solid food I want to eat is? It’s still a long way off, but you will be horrified to know that I’m desperately craving these salty delights:

 

 

Wired for the Off Season: A Catalogue of Gratitude

In recovery mode.

 

As we put on our coats and boots, I explained to my girlfriend, “The person who’s coming to pick us up and drive us to my appointment is super nice. He’s someone I know through the cycling community, although I’ve only met him in person… um, I think twice.” We were preparing to go to the follow-up appointment with my surgeon and, knowing we don’t own a car and I can’t currently take my usual form of transportation (my bike), this kind person had offered to pick us up and get us there. It was hugely appreciated.

This is not the blog post I’d been planning to write. I’d been thinking about writing a body-positive, feminist reflection on the concept of “getting to race weight.” Before I managed to start writing that, however, I found myself cycling home one evening with two friends: it was dark out and I remember feeling extra vigilant, as one does when riding at night. We had our lights and reflective gear on and I was attentive to debris in the road, pointing out loose gravel and other hazards as we rode — as I’ve been trained to do. The roads were quiet as we slowed down gradually on the flat, approaching a red light; suddenly, before I could really make sense of what was happening, I was cartwheeling over my handlebars in slow motion. Because I wasn’t able to get my hands out in front of me to break my fall, the first part of me to hit the pavement was my face. As I got up, I remember commenting “Oh. I think I’ve fractured my jaw,” but not actually believing what I was saying. My face hurt, but I’d never broken anything before. I hoped this was just a bad bruise. What had just happened didn’t make much sense to me:  I’ve clocked thousands of kilometres of road cycling alone and in packs, including clean technical descents, corners, and the like. I never expected to have an epic crash — a literal face plant onto the pavement — doing something as mundane as rolling up to a red light. What happened still doesn’t make much sense to me, but it’s clear to me that the front wheel or brake must have locked up in some unusual way.

The result is very clear though: I came away with a jaw broken in 4 places (2 of those places are badly broken at the TMJs), a concussion, several chipped teeth, and a split chin & lip (I’ll spare you the early photos). After what my surgeon described as a “difficult surgery” (apparently my jaw had receded to the point it was hard to pull back into place), my mouth is wired shut (imagine clenching your teeth together and then having them secured that way with wire. Now consider how talking, eating, sleeping, laughing, coughing, yawning, etc. are going to work. Not very well.). More than a week later the concussion symptoms are starting to fade enough for me to to read & write again, my stitches are out, and the bruises are starting to disappear. I’ve at last come to understand & accept the recovery process truly will be “months” as the ER doc said, despite my naive idea that I’d be back in the classroom teaching and back on my bike within a few days.

“Oh no, you don’t understand: I can’t take two to three weeks off,” I tried to explain to the ER doc who was writing me a note to that effect, while my jaw was still floating around in its various pieces.

Eating has been a challenge: try to see what will pass through your clenched teeth via a straw. Even purée has to be thinned out to a more watery consistency. Talking a little bit is fine  — I’m understandable as long as I already have the person’s attention and there’s no competing voices or ambient noise. It’s manageable. I kicked the morphine-family pain meds as quickly as I could. But, to be honest, the whole situation is a little overwhelming at times.

What was even more overwhelming though (and I mean the good kind of overwhelming) was the incredible generosity, kindness, and support I’ve received from family, colleagues, friends, acquaintances, the online community, and, well, people I hardly know. They deserve mention here and I’m profoundly grateful to all of them:

• first and foremost, my girlfriend E who dropped everything and flew over 4000 km to look after me. She has made countless nutritious shakes, kept careful track of my calories to make sure I’m not losing too much weight, patiently listened while I try to talk, and kept encouraging me.
• the quick-thinking colleagues who calmly scraped me off the ground, got me to the hospital and then helped solve practical problems like getting my bike home safely. I hope we get to ride together again when spring arrives.
• the person who came to stay with me in the ER, distracted me with stories while we waited for X-rays, and then took me home to her place so I didn’t have to stay overnight in the hospital.
• the grad students and colleagues who offered to cover my final few classes as I was panicking about not being able to be there but also in so much pain I could barely think straight. Thank you for your quick response.
• the person who, all the way from Toronto, arranged a local delivery of home-made soups the day after the crash when I had nothing I could eat at home.
• the person who texted me every day from Florida to check in on me, and who still does.
• the person who delivered groceries for me.
• the person who delivered energy drinks to me.
• the person who came over and babysat on day #2, pre-surgery, and went out to “liberate” a couple of straws from the local 7-11 so I could eat the soups that had been delivered.
• the hundreds of people who wrote kind messages of support on Facebook. The people who emailed. The people who texted. You have no idea how grateful I was for these.
• the 81 people who responded to my query on Facebook and recommended audiobooks, podcasts, and other non-text-based distractions. I’ve discovered the joys of audiobooks and now have a list to last, well, probably a lifetime. Thank you.
• the person who offered me their extra car to drive.
• the countless people who offered to drive me places, knowing how difficult it had suddenly become to get around.
• the person who took me to the surgeon’s office.
• the person who picked me up afterward and made sure I got home ok.
• the person who drove me & E to my follow-up appointment — the same person who sent me photos of their face after a similar accident to reassure me that this stuff does eventually heal.
• each of the people who made and delivered delicious, carefully thought out nutritious soups, as well as those who sent recipes. Thank you — those have sustained me in the past two weeks as I’m eating six meals a day to stay healthy.
• the people who have had broken jaws and wrote me with advice and encouragement. Each of you has mentioned what a lonely experience it is; I’ve found it incredibly helpful to learn from you what challenges lie ahead in the next months.
• the students who wrote me really kind messages after finding out I was out of commission for the final few classes. I’ve super missed our discussions about literature.
• the people who sent packages.
• the colleagues who sent a gorgeous bouquet of flowers.
• the friends who sent the poinsettia and also remembered to warn me they don’t mix well with cats.
• the cat, who has been somewhat comforting but mostly just a demanding, lovable pest who keeps me on my toes.

And to anyone I may have forgotten in the flurry of all these kindnesses — thank you.